It’s not uncommon for a couple’s sex life to reach a point of lows or even stagnation. People in long-term relationships may fall into specific patterns or routines in regards to how sexual activity is conducted, the types of positions you prefer, and the time of day it is. However, it’s vital to understand that, with regards to sexual desires, your preferences and actions can shift depending on what’s going on in your life and how you’re experiencing.
But, there’s many things that can be made to spice up a sex life such as a cock and ball ring. Some of the elements that people mention they miss in longer-term relationships include the excitement, mystery and fun. As such, anything we can do to help in bringing these elements back into your sex life will likely make the desired effect. Here are ten suggestions to explore…
1. Try sending flirtatious messages during the day.
Interests and turn-ons often change as time passes Therefore, think about creating a flirtatious and sexy space where you can explore these things together with your loved one. You could try playful texting by using a separate application such as Wickr Me to add a touch of fun to your text messages and to use it for only intimate messaging.
This way, you can play around with it and give a touch of intrigue to your conversations. It can certainly make regular moments a bit more interesting in the event that, through your secret messaging application, you receive a provocative photograph of your spouse at the time you least expect it.
2. Make sure to mix it up with your dates
Always schedule time for date nights — be they planned or spontaneous. You don’t need to get prepared, or show up and leave places together. Instead try mixing it up a little. It’s thrilling to meet someone after work, or visit the hotel where your companion is waiting. If you knock on the door, and you’ll open it onto an unknown, blank space and you are able to let your passion, fantasy or playfulness lead.
Even during lockdown, it is possible to inject plenty of variety to the evening by experimenting. Engage in a playful exchange when your partner returns from somewhere. Take time to have fun, light and enjoyable experiences. Why not dim the lights, put on some tunes and enjoy cocktails together?
3. Try a little role-play (if you’re confident in it)
Role-play can be good and enjoyable. For some, it is more comfortable starting with an app such as Dipsea to come up with ideas. Just remember, if you are looking to discuss the topic of role-playing with your friend it’s best to keep it fun and share your passions in a playful manner.
People tend to get off-balance in a relationship if they feel their partner is bored of their sexual life or look outside of their relationship for inspiration — so how you address the topic is really important. Try saying ‘I would love to see you wear …’ or ‘I’d really like to try …’ instead of saying ‘I’d really love to spend time together with my friend’- for obvious reasons…
4. Before you take action on them, simply share your fantasies
It’s crucial to keep in mind”spiking things up” doesn’t mean having a flurry of orgies as well as getting kinky. In fact, it can be just mixing things up a bit. You can initiate sex in a separate room, join your partner while showering, try to try foreplay- and other things like this. You might even mention your interest in sharing fantasies.
To do this, create an atmosphere that’s safe, perhaps discussing your fantasies over an alcoholic drink, or while giving each other massages. People can feel embarrassed about fantasies, so be mindful not to show alarm if the suggestions they’re making aren’t a attraction for you. Once you’re at ease, you’ll be closer . Just dip your toe to begin with, and let your natural curiosity to take shape.
5. Introduce a little bit of danger to the proceedings (but not for the sake of it)
Quickies, danger and high-thrill sexual experiences will definitely enhance your sexual encounters — and can make it very easy to mix things out. Sometimes, simply thinking about the thrills and experimentation you’ve tried before can be an attraction giving you a rush for you and your partner and a sexy memories and bonding experience.
The most important factor to consider in this case is whether you’re searching for a one-off or establishing an ongoing pattern. I would forget about taking on something “just for fun but instead, only try something if it’s a genuine turn-on for you both.
6. Take some time to explore the bodies of each other
Body exploration with a couple can be very enjoyable. Spend 20 minutes of your time focusing to each other with candles that smell nice and calm music playingand pay attention to the feelings that this creates inside your body.
Try varying the amount of pressure or how you interact with your partner. Also, take a look at every part of your body by touching it with your lips, hands and oils, silk, feathers, etc. It is extremely sensual and beneficial to try out with this new approach to intimacy. It could also make you feel more comfortable and enjoy orgasms.
7. Accessories and extras shouldn’t be in danger
The website that I’m a Editorial Director for, Jooi, has been designed to be non-threatening -with a thoughtful approach to language and images. Some partners feel awkward or intimidated by the content they encounter online, so it’s worth discussing what you may consider trying out first.
This might be an eye-lid or oils. Or maybe a vibrator that could be stimulating for one or both of you, or even a starter set. You could even buy this as a sexy surprise -in the event that you believe it will be appreciated or suggest that you research and find things together.
8. Try scheduling, however, you must also be flexible
Both spontaneity and scheduling can be a good fit for couples. Many couples appreciate a bit of both. Who doesn’t enjoy a sexy session you can plan and look forward to? It’s always worth reminiscing about the things you’ve enjoyed previously — and how they were approached. Additionally, think about your reactions to spontaneously intimate ideas, possibly via flirty messages.
9. Stop repeating your thoughts in the bedroom
You should definitely think about mixing it with the bedroom. Experiment with variation whether it’s postures in the approach or foreplay. Many couples notice that they usually use more or less of the sexual postures and that foreplay gets repetitive.
It could be that, in certain situations you are focusing on oral sex by itself or incorporate the use of oils mirrors, chairs, clothes, etc. It’s really not that difficult to mix it with other things once you’re in the same boat -however, it could take some thought and effort to ensure you don’t slip into routine or lazy tired sexuality (although that can be great also. Perhaps not every time!)
10. Be aware that you’re not the same people.
It is crucial. First, ensure that your love life is positive place. Sexual satisfaction and relationship satisfaction can influence satisfaction and vice versa- so ensure you are trying to improve your relationship on a general level. This includes improving communication and general intimacy and closeness (if it has shifted).
Also, don’t transform two people into one or enmesh. You must have your own distinct identities and differentiating characteristics as individuals. It’s not helpful in a sexual life if you are so close that you are doing everything togetherand practically finishing each other’s sentences.
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